Thursday, December 20, 2012

restless

You dwell in the songs that we are singing
Rising to the Heavens, rising to Your heart, Your heart
Our praises filling up the spaces
In between and frailty and everything You are

You are the keeper of my heart

And I'm restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
I'm restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
Oh God, I wanna rest in You

Oh, speak now for my soul is listening
Say that You have saved me, whisper in the dark
'Cause I know You're more than my salvation
Without You I am hopeless, tell me who You are
You are the keeper of my heart
You are the keeper of my heart

And I'm restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
I'm restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
I wanna rest in You

Still my heart hold me close
Let me hear a still small voice
Let it grow, let it rise
Into a shout, into a cry

Still my heart hold me close
Let me hear a still small voice
Let it grow, let it rise
Into a shout, into a cry

And I'm restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, let me rest in You
I'm restless, so restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
Oh God, I will rest in You
"restless" by audrey assad.

I've felt restless the past few weeks. Christmas prep has been a little hectic, and I've been working every morning this week. I also started violin lessons up again, and with all the different activities surrounding Charlie and Chocolate Factory and our church Christmas pageant - I've been running around like a chicken with....well, never mind. I've been busy.

Yesterday, as I was driving into work, again, I listened to Audrey Assad's CD "The House You're Building." I was sort of paying attention to the words, more just enjoying the music and thinking to myself. And driving, of course. Anyway, when the song "Restless" came on...I remembered that it was one of the songs the acapella group "Choose" sang when they performed at our church's fiftieth anniversary celebration. I started listening to the words.

I was convicted. 

I've been rushing around so much - choosing countless other minor activities and thoughts and worries over worshipping my Creator. While deep down knowing that my only peace and happiness can come in Him, and not realizing really what I was doing, I was seeking for rest elsewhere. Which is kind of the anti-Christmas. 

So I asked forgiveness. Asked forgiveness for my selfishness. Asked forgiveness for not acting like the bride of Christ. Asked forgiveness for not spending time with my Lover first thing in the morning. For not allowing the Spirit to fill my heart.

I'm still not there. I'm still not perfect, and I doubt I ever will be. I'm still a busy girl, still running here and there. But whenever I start forgetting what's really important, I pause and ask, "Remind me. Give me that peace that I'm searching for." 'Cause it's only in Christ that we find rest.

2 comments:

  1. Wow Jo. This was really what I needed to hear right now. This has been my hearts cry recently as well.....I'll be including you in my prayers for myself on this important subject. *hugs*

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  2. Neat song. You know who she's quoting, don't you?

    ~ The Ordinary Princess

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