Friday, January 24, 2014

home.

This is something I've been wrestling with for almost a year now. What and where is home? Being a very family oriented person, with deep loyalty to those I hold dear, I surprised myself this summer by not really missing home as much as I thought I would while I was in Colorado. Coming home, I missed Ellerslie, but within weeks, I was once again settled back in. And more and more, I realized I considered Ellerslie to be my home as well.

And then there's this business of growing up and moving on in life, and the ideas swirling through my brain of what I might be doing in a year, or even six months, and how the people I talk to say things like, "Don't talk about leaving!" or "We'll miss you!" or "You could just…do something here…" and in my heart, I know I will miss them, but the prospect of what happens when you're on an adventure with Jesus is too exciting.

If this was all purely mental, it would be easier to philosophize about and move on, but even this move - from the house and farm and area I loved to this new place that yes, is more convenient to town, but doesn't have a hold on my heart, has cut ties I had to this idea of "home."

So now I've been asking myself, "Liza, where is your home? For real?"


Last night, I had two wonderful Jesus conversations - one via Skype with my sunflower girl, Alyse, and one via phone with my best friend and sister and kindred spirit and member of the race that knows Joseph, Kate.

During the latter, Kate and I discussed rather extensively, this feeling of home. She's been working through the same thoughts, just in slightly different context, with different terminology. But she'd discovered something, through a series of events only Jesus could've aligned, that I had yet to get a grasp on.

So, last night, as I lay curled up in my bed, under my fleece blanket (recently returned to me after I left the poor dear in SC), with the phone tucked under my ear, I heard a phrase that filled me with instant peace. It was just plain, pure truth - it hit the nail on the head, brought into focus the blurry thoughts of my heart, and cleared the fog. It was simply, profoundly this:

"Home is where God is."

Home is where God is.

It's not a state. It's not people. It's not a house - even though it can be all those things, and that's good too. But for the restless, wandering soul, the comfort and joy and coziness of home is truly found in our Father. 

That's why my house in Charlottesville is home. Jesus is here.
That's why my church is home. Jesus is there.
That's why Ellerslie is home. Jesus is there.
That's why being with my dear friends and siblings in Christ is home. Jesus is there.
That's why I can ride out to meet the morning of this next phase of my life with excitement. Jesus is going with me.

Wherever He is, that's Home.
"But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself." - Philippians 3:20-21

4 comments:

  1. <3 <3 <3 Loved talking to you, dear. And thank you for this. It is just right.

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  2. So good, Liza. I've certainly got time to decide where I'll go after highschool, but I've been thinking about home and where it truly is too. I love my home, but I have a real conviction to travel - especially in whatever might be after school. This post brought me peace on the subject - thank you - and also got the gears of my brain shifting towards ideas and prospects. And that feels really good. :)

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  3. I hope I'm on your list of the members of the race that knows Joseph! You are certainly on mine. I love that you are in the same lifestage I am. I've loved for years the concept of sojourning, and Heb 11:13-16 -- "These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off were assured of them, embraced them and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth. For those who say such things declare plainly that they seek a homeland. ...they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them." Or, as, Rich Mullins would say, "I'm home anywhere / If You are where I am."
    ~ The Ordinary Princess

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